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A look at the moral development of a baby shows us how the most basic animal selfishness becomes an enlightened self interest. A baby is born, and begins to cry. He identifies only with the raw feelings and desires he's having, like the desire to eat. He doesn't care in the least that his crying causes his parents to lose hundreds of hours of sleep the first year. He just wants his food, drink, diapers, and to be held.
His is a selfishness or self interest that is very narrow. In fact, it's so limited by ignorance, that if possible, a newborn baby would drink the last drop of his mothers milk even at the cost of her life, just to satisfy a temporary hunger. He cannot understand what his mother needs nor care if she is hurt.
However, when he is a little bit older he starts to value others, and starts to show the first real signs of concern for them. Partly this is a matter of the direct rewards he receives, like the smile and hug he gets when he brings daddy a blanket. This is the beginning of his moral development.
He also has begun to identify with people. He sees his mothers tears, for example, relates this to his own experience of pain at some level, and so he wants to comfort her. This is his first experience of empathy, an important next step in moral development. (Self interest - the basis of morality - requires that we learn to associate with and understand others.)
Previously, he was concerned about little beyond his mouth and anus. But now his concept of self is growing beyond his body. He is a body and mind, and in a certain sense, the people around him are also a part of who he is. With this larger sense of identity, he develops the desire to satisfy not just his own hunger, but the needs of others as well. This is still a very primitive state compared to later maturity, still very limited by a lack of knowledge and experience. But it is an indicator of things to come.
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Note: This is all speculative, but I do think there is a "natural morality," or "moral compass," we almost all have, which is based on compassion. It's easy to see that it is in our own self interest to "do the right thing." Acting immorally does not give people anything of real value. Our experience shows us this, as does the latest scientific research on happiness levels in those who practice the conscious development of compassion. On this page I'm suggesting that morality is a normal development, not requiring forced "training," but perhaps helped with better understanding. |
We even come to see our things as part of ourselves. This process of identification can cause a man to wince in pain when his new car gets a dent, as though the damage was to him - because in a sense it was. We identify with others as well, and they become important to who we are. We want them to be happy, as though they are us - because they are. This is the process described in the story of the baby.
As the baby grows older, his very natural selfishness becomes a very natural concern for others around him. Of course, a child can be taught to be polite and to "show" respect for others, but to the extent that his development is normal, it isn't just a performance. He sees that "this person is like me," and treats others how he would like to be treated.
Of course, the idea "This is a person like myself," is an intellectual concept that may come later. For now it may just be an unspoken, even unthought recognition, and the psychology is probably more like, "This person IS me." Interestingly, the latter perspective is perhaps more directly useful in human relations than are the intellectual understandings that we invent later in life. (An idea worth exploring I think.)
When the child becomes old enough to think in moral terms, to have not just feelings, but ideas about good and bad, he may turn to religion. But contrary to what many think, religions often do little to cause love for others or moral feelings of any sort. These things are natural in humans as they develop. A person is born into a religious or philosophical system, and/or later chooses one that fits what is already felt, sensed or believed. At most, these systems help direct moral impulses that are already developing.
Now, like the proverbial "aha" moments of geniuses and inventors, we sometimes are introduced to moral ideas that make us feel (and perhaps say aloud) "Exactly -that's right!" This is essentially a recognition of something we have already experienced in some way. Now we just have the words for it. This may even cause us to "buy into" a new morality.
What it really shows is that morality itself is entirely natural, starting with normal self interest and developing (hopefully) into a more expanded and enlightened view of your self and what is actually in its interest. A moral system can be a great help, providing guidance and support, but it does not create the impulse to do good.
As the child becomes a man, he sees that he is one of many men and women, and they all have some of the same concerns and needs as himself. He is interested in his own life, but he feels a part of the larger group as well, and so has a respect and concern for others. Without a doubt part of this is that others will be useful to him. They will provide jobs, money, goods and services. Society - or his religious and spiritual leaders - may discourage him from thinking of people in terms of "usefulness," but this too is natural.
Also natural, is the impulse to help others for no immediate financial or otherwise measurable gain. The gain is real, just not commonly or easily measured. We want to help others.
Consider how in the privacy of our own homes, we feel for a character in a movie, after "knowing" him or her for just a few minutes. If we can identify with and feel the impulse to help a character in a movie, why wouldn't we want to help real people? It makes us happy to so, and so is entirely selfish and natural.
There may be people, for example, who truly "love" everyone they meet, and are happy to help them in any way they can. I'm not one of them, but they probably exist. The development of the self and its expansion and enlightenment is natural, but how far it goes - and in what specific direction - isn't predictable. This moral development is different for each of us.
Continued here: Moral Values